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Am I the only one that gets nervous when someone does a back ground check? I don’t really have anything to hide, but there’s always that niggling notion that maybe they’ll come up with something I don’t even know about. Like something my evil twin did and blamed on me or maybe I really have multiple personalities and one of them is a total D-bag.

I’m always afraid they’ll come up with some horrible list of crimes that I’m wanted for from some mistaken identity or one of the times I’ve had my identity stolen. Worse, I know that if they come up with such a list I’ll totally react wrong.  The investigator will walk in, swinging a pair of hand cuffs and say, “Sir, are you aware you’re wanted on nine counts of murder and three counts of check fraud.”

And I’ll say something stupid like, “But officer! I’ve never forged a check in my life!”

I don’t know. It’s probably just me.

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