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This is your math warning.
This post will involve math and math geekery.
Oh… and a little foul language. Just a little.

Earlier today I was in something of a, how shall I put it, crass mood. And, after a particular incident told someone: “Go F*ck Yourself.”

(Before I go on, I feel I should admit that this is a bad thing to say and if any children, pets, civilized humans, aliens, or other sentient or semi-sentient life forms are reading this you should never repeat this phrase. There.)

Anyway. I told this jerk off and then walked away. but later, I was thinking about what I’d said. Not in any sort of contrite or repenting way, (hell, I still think it was the right thing to tell the guy,) but I was thinking about it in a math way. That’s right. I’m that big of a geek. See the phrase “Go F*ck Yourself” is kind of neat. Each word is twice as long as the one before it: 2 letters, then 4 letters, then 8 letters.

That led me to realize that it’s not only double the length of the word before it, but it’s an exponential expansion of the initial word: 2^1=2, 2^2=4, 2^3=8.

Which led me to wonder what other phrases I could come up with that had that expansion:
“Go F*ck Yourself.”
“No Don’t Dehydrate.”
“Do Long Division.”

So then how about I increase the expansion? Start with a three letter word, then square it for nine letters, then cube the first word for 27 letters. And that’s where I got stuck. I don’t know very many 27 letter words. None, really. I might be able to look some up, but then what about if I start with a four letter word, the next would be 16 and the third 64. I certainly don’t know any 64 letter words. Again, I could probably look some up, but they wouldn’t be in English anymore. Maybe Welsh Gaelic? I think they’ve got some pretty long words.

But then it occurred to me that I don’t have to limit it to single words. If I’m expanding the exponential base, then I can expand the word base and go from words to Stanzas.

This means the first stanza has three letters, the second nine, and the third 27. This is way more doable:

bananas are probably more ready.”

With that we can expand this as far as we want, using however long of word for our starting place and just exponentially increase it from there. Do you know what this means?!? I just invented a new form of poetry!  How awesome is that!?!

Sure, no one will ever use it, and it will never be famous beyond this blog, but it’s an accomplishment and I’m proud! (Should I put this on my resume?)